Scorpion's Reach V

Just finished the storyboard and sent it to Kaytala to see if she thinks it's worth anything. Maybe it's worth writing - maybe not. I plan to let three people read it to see if they like it. Two of the spots have already been taken, but there's one left so if anyone wants to read the storyboard, please comment and I'll send you an email draft and you can tell me if you think it's worth it. Best two out of three and I'll write it. By the way, I'm not sending it to people who just like everything I do. I'm trying to keep it sensible. However, I must point out that a lot of stuff changes while you write - you need to be flexible. So I think the finished product will turn out better than the storyboard. I find that that's usually what happens.

Scorpion's Reach IV

Well, fanfiction.net finally opened up its large gates and all their back emails came flooding into my inbox like a tidal wave. And I found out something - there's a lot more support for me to write 'Scorpion's Reach' than I thought there was.

I've also figured out a couple solutions to the problems I was having. A couple scenes played out in my head and I almost got inspired. Almost. The thing that's still dragging me down is that - I'm tired - and I can't think up an ending.

Well, right at this second I thought of something that didn't point towards Hitomi becoming a murderer, but it also strips her of her protaganist powers.

Whenever my ... man reads 'Mark of a Goddess', he reads the end and he's so confused as to why Hitomi isn't the one in the heat of things - instead it's Van. But I never heard any readers complain about that. Hmmm....

Anyway - I'm still thinking. I haven't yet come to a decision. I'll post my next chapter when I make up my mind.

Scorpion's Reach III

This is the third post about the possibility of me writing a fourth book to my Escaflowne trilogy.

Next time, I think I'll post my storyboard for this thing, just for your interest, because I don't think I'm going to write it. I can't think of an ending, and I don't want to start half-cocked. That's messy and against my policy.

There are just the following problems in my writing life:

• I can't write this book from Hitomi's perspective. It's impossible. I already fought her like a tigress during 'Mark of a Goddess' and I'm tired of fighting her. I would have to go to Folken's POV at least once in order to make this worth while and I don't want to suddenly change writing styles for the fourth book.
• I'm tired of Van and Hitomi. These days when I sit around and think up scenarios - everything good that I think up goes massively against both their characters. Basically, I want to write about a girl who isn't a good girl. I also want to write about a guy who's more of a manwhore than Van. Dryden couldn't enter into the fourth book - he would have no purpose. I think the soul of that thought is that I really want to write 'Ghost Mist' even though I'm a little discouraged. I should pluck up my courage and get on with it.
• Everything in the possible plot for 'Scorpion's Reach' points to Hitomi becoming a murderer. I think that should be avoided, because I really wouldn't be able to continue the story after book four. And I would hate for people to say, 'Just read up until the end of 'Mark of a Goddess'. The rest isn't good.'
• I did conclusive endings for Allen, Gaddes, Eries, Dryden, Selphie, and a whole lot of other characters. So, these characters are useless because they have no problems to solve. They can't help me with book four.

It's mostly frustrating because I know my readers won't move over to read 'Ghost Mist' and actually, who the *^&* am I to recommend to them that they should? I should just say that I'm working on fictionpress and leave it at that.

You know what else, even though I receive a lot of praise for my work - I still get a lot of blowback that I could do things better. I get all kinds of comments (not on ff.net) about how immature my work is. And that raises questions like, 'Why am I doing this? Am I doing this for fun? Or am I doing this with the hope that perhaps one day I'll be able to get something published? Is getting something published the extent of my goal, or what am I aiming for here?' I wish I knew the answer to these questions, because if I did, I could do something radical.

If my goal is to get something published then I should just write 'Ghost Mist', send it to my sister-in-law, let her skin me alive, then I should send it to my father-in-law and let him skin me alive. Then if I took all their suggestions, I could send something to a publisher. But I have this sinking feeling that my heart wouldn't make it past my sister-in-law. After she was finished with me I would be so disheartened that I might never show anything to anyone ever again. It isn't that she would mean to be mean to me, but I wouldn't be able to handle having my heart ripped out and sent through the meat grinder. She would tell me the truth and I wouldn't be able to handle it.

If my goal is to be acclaimed on ff.net - then I've already achieved it as far as I'm concerned. Either that or I should start writing fanfic for Kenshin and see if I can earn a hundred reviews with a single chapter (lol). Actually, I know that wouldn't be as satisfying as I think it would be. Afterwards, I would still feel parched.

If my goal is to write for teenage girls (this is what I always believed my goal was) then I should never stop writing Escaflowne fanfiction. However, this cannot be. My brain requires more stimulation than this. Either that, or I should take one of my older novels and transform it into an Escaflowne fanfic. Why not? I mean, it worked with Dragon's Moon. That's the only way I could enjoy writing Escaflowne fanfic. Figuring out a way to make my old stuff passable. HA! I should try this. Just for kicks and giggles.

Lastly, if my goal is to write for fun then I should tell off anyone who tells me that they found an error in my work. You know - I've never once believed that I do this for fun. It's more of a sick compulsion that I can't seem to kick than a hobby that brings me pleasure. I like reading my stories. That's mostly what brings me pleasure. I think I write better than anyone. I write novels I wish other people would write. That's all. I guess I also like getting into other people's heads and having them obsess over my story. I like that too.

Blah - now I've written myself into a knot. This is how I feel, but what I've explained means that I don't know how to escape the trap. I write - some people won't like it. Some people know more about writing than me. Well, that's good for them.

Scorpion's Reach II

Okay, this is the second post about a fourth book to my Escaflowne trilogy.

So I sat around and thought about this very seriously ... for hours and hours and HOURS. And I'm basically here to say that if I do this - it's going to be a lot darker than my other Escaflowne stories. It's going to make everything else look like 'Strawberry Shortcake on Icecream Island' compared to the dark that I'm going to bring out of the rabbit hole. I will have never written anything quite like this before, but basically, I've just danced around the fire with my previous works. If I continue I'm going to get burned and everyone is going to walk away a little less innocent.

Just a warning - I may have to move the rating up to M for Mature.

Scorpion's Reach

So, this post is about the possibility of me writing a forth book to my Escaflowne trilogy. I honestly didn't think that so many people would be interested in me writing a fourth book. In my author's notes for the last chapter of 'Mark of a Goddess' I asked everyone to say so if they wanted to have a fourth book. I was absolutely stunned by how many people said that they would be interested in a fourth installment. I didn't think there would be that much interest.

Right now, I'm really not sure if it's something that I want to do.

One of the major flaws of my Escaflowne trilogy is that it's written in limited omniscent. So, I can only write from Hitomi's point of view. Up until now - that has sort of irritated me - but I wanted to learn to write with boundries, so I dealt with it. But, now I have a way of fixing that without betraying the style I started with. Hitomi could have visions of things as a third party - so she could see things happening that she hasn't been able to see before. And that could be really helpful.

So, stuff that will have to happen if I do a fourth book? Sorry, if this is spoiling anything for anybody, but I need a place to write some ideas and see if I can get anything interesting out of it - at least enough to fill 24 chapters. I don't know if I have enough material to fill 24 chapters.

Folken will have to decide if he's going to choose Naria or Eriya as his contract bound woman. I know he doesn't actually make a decision in the series, but within the bounds of my story - he has to choose only one of them. I was leaning towards him choosing Eriya. She seemed to have a better attitude and be a trifle less evil than Naria. And I'm going to need Naria to be all the evil she can be plus a little bit more.

Next - in case some of you haven't figured it out. Dilandau is the person who inherited The Devil's tarot abilities. And also in case you didn't know - scorpions symbolize revenge. So, I think I'd call the book 'Scorpion's Reach'. Actually, this is the part of the book that would make me extra happy, because I really like working with Dilandau. And since he's all vengeful - he'd have to go after Hitomi and Chid directly. So, like the series, he would be aiming for revenge - except mostly against Hitomi (that makes Hitomi a bigger part of the action). So, for that - I think this would be fun.

Dilandau would also have to pair up with Naria, which would make for an interesting dynamic. For one thing, he's like eight years younger than Naria and she'd want him for her lover. So that continues our 'age differences' theme from the other books. But you see, Dilly would resist something like that, because in his heart - he only cares about Celena.

Then there's Van and Hitomi. So, in the first book we had the first flowers of romance - first kiss. In the second book we had the wedding and the separation. In the third book - active sexuality (though not described). So, what's left? That's right. In a normal relationship that advances naturally - Hitomi would be pregnant now. I still haven't decided on that path yet. I was going to leave 'Mark of a Goddess' really open so that the reader could decide if Hitomi was able to have children or not. But if I do another book - I'll definitely have to answer the question. Hmm ... Personally, I had kind of been leaning towards her not being able to have children, but I was never planning on answering that question. It was always the plan to leave it open. But if I did a fourth book - I would pretty much have to answer the question with a 'yes'. So, basically, Hitomi would be pregnant for the entirety of the next book. The time frame for 'Mark of a Goddess' has been around three weeks. So, yep - Hitomi would probably wouldn't even get to delivery time before the end of the fourth book. Not only that, but writing a book that has anything to do with pregnancy sounds like non-fun to me. I couldn't get enthusiastic about a project like that. Everyone always tells me to write what I know about, but MAN ALIVE - that wouldn't make me happy. I would just relive some of the least fun moments of my own life.

So, if I didn't have Hitomi being pregnant - what else could I do with the plot? I've already heard a lot of noise that if I cut Hitomi off from motherhood - I'll be pissing off a whole section of my readers. I know a lot of people think that I shouldn't have that sort of thing on my mind while I write, but I can't help it.

What I really mean is - how could I deepen Hitomi and Van's love at this point without having them have children? I've already threatened their relationship with a separation and tempted Hitomi with other men. Not a lot coming to mind here - but this is one of the problems that I will brainstorm after this.

The other thing that could happen that would bring them together is that Dilandau could murder Hitomi's whole family. I originally had that happen in the first book after Hitomi is dragged out of the apartment by Dilandau's thugs. But at this point in the story - it would be so brutal that Hitomi would be a freaking mess. Not only that - but I think that might alienate my readers. Doing something that drastic is pretty nasty when they've been reading for over 300,000 words. But it would cause Van and Hitomi to get closer together in a way that hasn't happened yet. Hmmm - that sounds a little hardcore. Maybe too nasty.

The next thing that is probably a necessity is that the location of the story might have to change. I'll be giving up the setting of Dryden's mansion by the end of 'Mark of a Goddess'. The most natural thing would be to move the story to Madrid, but frankly - there is no friggin' way I'm falling into that trap.

Chid is going to have to be a main character from now on. Folken will have to wait in the wings for awhile - though I can see him having a part to play eventually. I can't see Allen being useful at all anymore. I could start out the book with Hitomi being interviewed by The Historian. So that's a new character I could bring in. I also have no clue what sort of role Dryden and Selphie would have in the next book. Or Gaddes and Eries for that matter. I'm done with Aunt Flo and Merle and I was just contemplating killing Hitomi's whole family. Hmm... that's looking like a better idea by the minute. But that means that I haven't got a whole lot of characters to work with. Let's see I've got:

Hitomi
Van
Dilandau
Chid
Naria
Folken
Eriya
The Historian
Dallet
Miguel

That's not good folks - that's half the cast of 'Mark of a Goddess'. When I made up my character sketches for 'Ghost Mist' I think I ended up with 25 characters. Ten is pathetic beyond all reason. I don't know if I can even pull of a story like this with only ten characters. Let's see - how many did I have for 'Dragon's Moon' - that might help me think.

Hitomi
Van
Millerna
Mrs. Kanzaki
Eries
Allen
Merle
Aunt Flo
Dilandau
Miguel
Chid
Celena
Gaddes

I had 13, but it only gets worse as we go along - I just add more and more and more. I think I've used all the remaining characters from Escaflowne. I'll probably need some more characters and they'll probably all have to be original since I've already picked Escaflowne's bones clean. Dang it! I wish I hadn't already used Amano - he could have saved my can right about now. Dang!

Blah!

My Selfishness

You know, I get less and less conceted about my own writing everyday. I've been sort of sloppy lately and it's only been getting worse. I haven't had a lot of inspiration and I've had even less motivation. I'm in a dry spell and yet I don't stop writing because I somehow feel obligated to finish what I started. Some people even want me to write another Escaflowne book. I could probably do it, and I could probably think of a plot that wouldn't suck, but I can't imagine my readers actually following me through another 24 chapters. I think they'll get bored. Everyone got bored during Van's 14 chapter absense in 'Mystic Wings'. They just don't understand. If Hitomi is going to be heroic, then Van can't be around. But I was told that the parts where Hitomi went to The Voltage Room without him were boring.

Ah well, what do I know about writing? I know plenty. Actually, the more I read about the subject I'm startled by how much I already know. But simply by my personality - I know that whenever I think I know something - I am only scratching the surface. I'm the type who knows how to B.S. my way through anything. I always sound self assured and conceited. People love taking me down a notch. People love hearing three little words out of me and they're not 'I love you' - they're 'I was wrong'.

I've just finally learned something - NO ONE WANTS TO HEAR AN ACCURATE DESCRIPTION OF HOW THEY WRITE. They don't want to hear what they're weaknesses are.
I know what mine are. I suck at sentence construction. Isn't that weird? But it's true - it's a huge flaw. You know what else I suck at? I suck at allowing my characters time to interact when it doesn't have anything to do with the plot. You know what else? I suck at adding those little details that people love. You know what else? I suck at agonizing over my story. I hate leaning over already finished material and scrutinizing every damn word. I want to pick the perfect word for something, but I only have so much patience over it before I pick a serviceable one and go. And that's how it goes. When I hear people comment on any of these things - I've honestly given up being irritated and instead it's just like: "Yep. I know - I'm still sort of sucky. My bad!" But I can only have that kind of attitude when I haven't spent much time with the story. That's when I write it, go over it a couple times, send it to my beta reader, read it again and post it. Then I don't care what they say because I can hardly remember what happened, or what I said.

You know I was trying to be more grown up in 'Ghost Mist', and so there were longer paragraphs and people actually told me it was a flaw. Well, heck, then I'm never going to grow up. And if I never grow up, then I'm going to be living in Neverland until I'm OLD. And then I'll have lost my chance.

But in a way, I'm getting exactly what I want. I'm writing for my demographic and a lot of people have written in and told me how my story captivated them. I should be happy. I just wish that I didn't have to scam off someone else's idea to get an audience. BLAH!

I've got to stop now. I'm getting too depressed and I don't even think I have a reason to be depressed. Everything has been going swimmingly.

Writing Guidelines

Today, I was reading the Mystery Newsletter I get on writing.com and it had this list of pointers for authors in it. I'm mostly saving it here as a reminder to myself.

When you are ready to start revising your piece, keep these eight things in mind.

1. Read it aloud. Your ears will catch awkward wording your eyes missed. If you are stumbling over parts, or having to go back and re-read something, then it needs to be either reworded or expanded.

2. Listen to your characters' dialogue. Does it sound natural? Does it fit the characters? Be sure you don't have too much dialect in your dialogue. Ya'll is a nice way to show a character is from the South, but if every other word out of your character's mouth is ya'll, then it can get tedious to read. Remember a little goes a long way.

3. Tie up all the loose ends of your story's plot. If you have a minor plot line going be sure to end it. Don't leave your reader hanging at the end wondering what happened to Tony when he went off down that dark alley to help the main character look for clues.

4. Avoid using the same word over and over. Every writer does this, even the most famous. If you are careful, you can catch these minor repeats and replace the overused word with a more suitable one. Buy a good thesaurus and use it.

5. Beware of run-on sentences. A sentence with too many clauses and phrases can be confusing. Try breaking a run-on sentence into two, or shortening it.

6. Be careful of words that sound the same, but have different meanings. They're-there-their all sound the same, but don't mean the same. Same with it's-its. Remember your spell checker isn't going to catch these kinds of typos, you have to.

7. Use exclamation points only when one of the characters, or the writer, is actually exclaiming. It was a wild, exciting ride. Period. No exclamation point. But with, "What a wild, exciting ride!" the exclamation point is right. Be sure to use question marks correctly too.

8. Use your spell check or dictionary to make sure that words you're unsure of are spelled correctly. Spell checker will catch probably 95% of all misspells. The rest you'll have to catch by reading your piece.

Having another person read your work and circle any parts that don't make sense, or need to be revised, will also help you polish your prose. I know some writers, especially new ones, have trouble allowing others to read their work. But that is part of the writing process, allowing the outside world a look at your story.

According to these standards - I am a goddess. Why do I still have so much to work on then? Blah. My sentence structure is naturally confusing. It's because I watched all those 'British Literary' movies when I was a teenager. I'm never going to get that taste out of my mouth and they use unnecessary words all over the place. Especially the ones that take place in the 18 hundreds.

I'm prolly better than I think, and I don't actually think I'm a goddess. I'm more like - a mortal.